08 Jan Start With The End in Mind

Recently I was reminded how short and fragile our lives really are.  A good friend lost her long, hard fought battle to colon cancer on New Year’s Day 2016.  She was only 47.  It was a reminder that I need to use my time more wisely.  We don’t get extra.  On days like this we naturally ask ourselves about the meaning of life.  As I listened to the Eulogy, I pondered how people may summarize my life, when I finally lose my last battle.  What are the things that matter the most?  How do we want to be remembered?  How can we intentionally design our lives so that the most important things are at the center?

Start by dividing your life into its major roles:  Family, Friends, Spiritual, Career, Financial, Health, and Intellect.  Write a personal mission statement, or as I prefer to call it my personal constitution.  Include in your personal constitution for each role of life what it is you want to achieve.  Literally write down your thoughts.  The process of writing will help you critically evaluate each role and clearly formulate your personal goals.   This will likely take some time, maybe weeks or months.  You will likely make many revisions to this document as you grow and learn more about yourself.  This will become the core set of principles by which you will live your life.  (Read my post on living a Proactive vs. Reactive Life.)  Are there habits or activities that are totally incongruent or opposed to your ideals.

These are the areas that set apart a life of Design from a life lived by Default.  From where does the center of your strength or emotional worth come?  Is it yourself, your finances, or career?  It may be centered around something good like your marriage, kids, friends, or even your church.  What happens when your finances or career stumble?  What do you lean on in those difficult times?  If you experience hard times in your marriage and that is your stabilizing force, how do you cope when the marriage struggles.   I contend that even the good things, if not backed by a set of core principles, can cause instability, even if the center of your life is your church.  You can be very busy in the church but not actively living the gospel.  Instead, a life based on central core principles should be your guiding force.  My core principles are based on my faith in Jesus Christ.  Psalm 18:2 “The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.”  Core principles don’t change unlike circumstances or people.

Visualize milestone events in your future life such as your retirement, your 50th wedding anniversary, or maybe your own funeral.  As you’re standing around the table at your 50th wedding anniversary, visualize what your spouse is saying.  At your retirement party, what will your coworkers say you accomplished during your career.  As your pastor, priest, or rabbi delivers your Eulogy, how will your life be summarized?  Use this visualization technique to develop specific outcomes for each role of  your life, then write specific actions that must be accomplished for each of the goals to come true.  Start with the end result in mind.  One of our sayings in car racing is “you will go where you are looking.”  If you panic in a tight situation and stare at the obstacle in your way, guess what, you are going to hit the obstacle.  If you stare at the gap between the obstacles, then you are much more likely to slip through the gap.   Focus on where you want to go.  Run the race of your life with the end in mind!

Here’s to the Journey!

(David W. Ball, MD, an Internal Medicine physician, founder of NuVitality Health – a wellness education company, and co-founder of Life Changing Fitness – a fitness facility for Every Body)